Hi bitches. Welcome to our new refreshed, refurbished, cluster fuck of a website. If we haven’t met before – I am Jackie Schimmel Haas host of podcast “The Bitch Bible”. Disclaimer: if you are easily offended, morally inflexible and aren’t down with casual but well intentioned beastiality then you should probably go follow some bitch…
Guest Review: Jackie, that’s me.
Ep: Held Hough-Stage Jackie: She’s one of my all-time favorite guests with some serious range. On this episode I dissect the outfits, substance choices, and age of Lollapalooza attendees and why it discouraged me from procreating. I also dive into Julianne Hough’s need for a dimmer, Gigi Hadid dating a Bachelor alum (bummer bama Hannah),…
Guest Review: Barbara Kavovit
EP: Housewives Under Construction with Barbara Kavovit Barbara: Apple-less cast member of the Real Housewives of New York, a Countess Confidant, and Author of Heels of Steel. On this episode Barbara and I put our fucking hard hats on and hammer this season out. We talk about how she is happy without her apple, the…
Guest Review: Taylor Strecker
EP: Lez it Be TAYLOR: Comedian, radio veteran, podcast host, and a lesbian with a soft “S.” On this episode Taylor and I delve into the depths of relationships, Instagram, and our love/hate with celebs. We talk about her journey from P to V, why no advice is the best advice, what it means to…
10 Things I wish I had learned before the age of 25…
My fucking eyebrows. It’s been a real journey. Likeability > skill set. Nobody wants to help an asshole. Vodka cranberries are socially and morally unacceptable. You never have to do ANYTHING you don’t want to. Advice is more often than not, unhelpful and distracting. Quality is better than quantity ALWAYS. People, food, belongings. Talking shit…
Housewife Horoscopes
Who are you most alike?? Aries = VICKI GUNVALSON TRAIT: Gets along with Leo’s. PLEASE COME ON MY PODCAST. Taurus = LUANN de LESSEPS TRAIT: Self-Indulgent. She is a Countess you know. Gemini = ANDY COHEN TRAIT: Can be easily bored. Which is why he surrounds himself with crazy ladies all day long. Cancer = ERIKA GIRARDI TRAIT: Self-protective. “I’m good” Leo = TINSLEY…