Gift Giving Guide

They say “it’s the thought that count’s” when giving a gift. I believe whoever made that up was probably a shitty gift giver. If someone knits you a blanket from their own hair  or a fucking paper mache statue of you versus a Rolls Royce, I think it’s pretty obvious which you’d be most excited about (the paper mache statue obvs). Let’s keep it real. It’s not always the thought that counts. With Mother’s Day behind us and Father’s Day on the horizon I have been thinking about what would be a great present. The one person I have always found the hardest to buy for is my mother. Firstly, anything she would really want she would just go buy for herself. Secondly, if you do buy her something she feel’s bad and will try and re-imburse you. So what do you give the ungiftable woman?

One of the perks of being a top-notch rhymer and having a live in music man is I have been able to give the invaluable gift of song.  For her birthday last year, we gifted her “Glass of Chardonnay” it quickly became a family anthem. We played it at Thanksgiving, Hanukkah, at BBQ’s, whenever and wherever. After the positive fan feedback from our first hit, I knew for Mother’s Day I had to “drop my next track”.  A few things you should know before listening…

  1. This is without a doubt my most embarrassing post.
  2. For some God forsaken reason, my grandparents gave my mother the middle name “Gay”. (She know uses my father’s middle name Loren… whats with my family and these terrible middle names?)
  3. My mother lives and breathes for a chilled glass of Chardonnay.

I apologize. Happy Saturday.


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