Bitch Approved Holiday Looks

A couple weeks ago I had the privilege of visiting the ShopWasteland headquarters and got an immediate fashion boner. It’s no secret I love a sequin and the second I walked through the doors it was like I got hit in the face with a snowball made of glitter (which for the record is a good thing… actually a GREAT thing). I have been going to Wasteland for years to scavenge designer consignment finds and was delighted to check out their online store that is mostly fab new clothes as well as some vintage finds. I met with some sexy ladies who showed me the new holiday pieces and I instantly fantasized about being invited to a plethora of holiday parties (which I am famously unfond of) just to have an excuse to bust out the sequins, make idle chitchat with distant yet creepy relatives and go balls deep in a holiday cheese ball. Clearly, the reflection from all the sequins, glitter and metallic was getting to me… lusting for a CHEESE BALL? Not haute.The showroom showcased all the fundamentals of life I feel every Haute Mess should have. Jumpsuits? Uh you betcha. Thigh-high slits? Check. Sequins? Duh. More sequins? Double duh.

Since writing this blog has gotten be alienated from my usual cycle of holiday parties so in honor of that, I have decided to put together some holiday looks for the fabulous parties I will undoubtedly be b-listed to. Did I mention all these items are under $100? Fuck yes.

skirtSequin Stunner Skirtimage (3)Cut-out JumpsuitgreenLimelight Dress and Haute Mess Bootiepearl top Pearl Mesh Top (no longer available – sorry bitches) It has also been called to my attention that my feet look humongous and I must have a very large penis…which I do.

Shop all these looks at ShopWasteland.com sign up and win a free $100 gift card so you too will be able to outfit yourself to be a big time hoe, hoe, hoe and perhaps engage in inappropriate behavior with one of your superiors at your company holiday party (which I have of course, have never done – because I am a fucking angel). XOXO

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